BUILD YOUR DREAM TEAM™
Choose wisely. Your investors are watching. 👀
YOUR CREW 👥
📐REQ. ENGINEER
1
"They turn chaos into requirements. Mostly chaos."
— Chad, Intern 🤙
💻DEVELOPER
2
"They ship features. Also bugs. Mostly bugs."
— Chad, Intern 🤙
🧪TESTER
1
"The ones who find out your Devs lied. They're not popular."
— Chad, Intern 🤙
SEED FUNDING 💰
💰 20 BUDGET
Enough to buy a standing desk. Barely.
BOARD SETTINGS ⚙️
WIP LIMITS PER COLUMN
Work In Progress limits define how many stories can be active at once. Lower = faster flow. We know, counterintuitive. Trust the process.
— Chad, Intern 🤙
BACKLOG (REFILLS)
3
REQ. ENGINEERING
2
DEVELOPMENT
3
TESTING
2
SPRINT LENGTH ⏱️
20 rounds = one quarter. Or two failed pivots. Same thing.
I'M READY TO DISRUPT →
No refunds. No do-overs. No mercy. Just vibes. 🦄